“I’m Leaving for Growth” and Other Exit Interview Lies
Most exit interviews feel like a polite hostage negotiation.
The employee’s halfway out the door with a laptop-shaped dent in their backpack. HR’s trying to extract insights like it’s Mission: Impossible.
And both sides are silently agreeing:
“Let’s just get through this without crying, lying, or opening Slack again.”
But! It could be useful. It could even be good.
Let’s talk about how to make exit interviews work.
1. The Theatre of "We Just Want Feedback"
We all know the classics:
“I’m leaving for a new challenge.”
“It’s not about the money.”
“Leadership? Oh no, they were… fine.”
Which is code for:
“I was bored out of my skull.”
“It is absolutely about the money.”
“My manager once said 'radical candor' and then ghosted me for 6 months.”
The problem?
Exit interviews are often treated like loyalty tests in disguise. People don’t speak freely because — surprise — they still want a reference, or at least a clean LinkedIn break-up.
Source: Tenor
2. The Punchline: You're Not Fooling Anyone
If you’ve ever read five exit interviews in a row and they all sound like AI-generated breakup texts, that’s not "a pattern" — that’s fear.
Because here’s the actual exit interview script nobody prints:
“I’d tell you the truth, but you promoted the problem last quarter.”
“HR ‘open door’ policy? Cute. So is the Easter Bunny.”
“You asked for feedback once. Then did nothing. So… pass.”
3. But Wait — There’s Hope!
Exit interviews can be gold mines, if you stop treating them like postmortems and start treating them like prequels to something better.
How to do that:
✅ Make it safe.
Let someone outside the reporting line ask the questions. Or better yet, let people write their truths anonymously, with sarcasm allowed.
✅ Ask real questions.
Not “Why are you leaving?” (We know why.)
Try:
“What would have made you stay six more months?”
“Which moment made you think: I need to get out?”
“What would you warn your clone about before joining here?”
✅ Actually do something.
And if you can’t? Be honest about that too.
People can smell performative HR a mile away.
TL;DR for the People Already Scanning:
If you want honesty, don’t make it a loyalty test.
Exit interviews can be helpful, but only if you’re listening and acting.
No one’s going to trash their manager while you’re taking notes in a company hoodie.
